“…We’re hoping to have a good session today. And I’ll turn it over to Dr. Al Tikriti to get started.” --Patel ::oh the irony::
“...Intermingles with some other cells in the neighborhood, and therefore causes some sort of spines.”-Al Tikriti
“Great...thank you Dr. Al Tikriti..”-Pummy (after AT speaks..is Pume being sarcastic? who knows.)
“Don’t memorize a whole list.... you’ll be sitting there on the test like god damn what was that...” -Hoang
“When you talk to your patients, you need to talk at their level. Don’t use all the fancy science terms we put on these tests, otherwise your patients will hate you and they won’t come back, and you won’t be able to take their money...” -Hoang
“On thick skin we need to use heavy duty, don’t use something sissy like hydrocortisone...” - Hoang
“In dermatology as a private care physician, I have two visits to take care of a problem. I have an initial visit, and then a follow up, and if I don’t fix it then they go to some other dermatologist.” - Hoang
“I will tell you, even though I am a dermatologist I own three [stethoscopes]. I confess I don’t know what S1 and S2 are... but I know how to listen for wheezes.” - Hoang
“I’m not a lawyer. I’m your alumni! I’m here to help you.” - Hoang
“Well we really appreciate you putting off your flight to Cancun until this afternoon... although it probably was cheaper.” - Pummy
“Having Necrotizing fascitis is a life-altering event.... and if you don’t diagnose it... it is potentially a career altering event” - Pummy
“I want everyone here to just push the button, even if you are tired of pushing the damn thing.... just let me know you are alive... unless you are dead... then you don’t have to press the button.... 88 huh... that’s all that's here? Anyone not pressing the button just to be annoying?” - Pummy asking us to all click in on a quiz question we have previously answered the Friday before spring break... honestly a bit surprised there were even 88 of us there...
“Pseudofolliculitis Barbae... well what predisposes patients to that? Shaving...right okay... are you going to ask him if he is shaving his [junk]?” - Pummy
“Yup” John Barrus
“Well good on you, I mean it is LA so people do all sorts of weird things...” - Pummy
“What does glaborous mean? I know mom said you shouldn’t [masturbate] because you will grow hair on your palms... but the truth is.... you can’t. Glaborous means there are no hair follicles.” -Pummy
“Okay this patient just came back from Cancun and she has this rash on her butt...what is this? Anyone have any ideas about this.... c’mon theres a wild world out there... what is this?”
“Spider bite” -Student
“No, a little more exotic... she’s shaving her butt? Well not that exotic...”
“She got busy in the forest and got poison oak on her butt.” -Amberger
“She got busy in the forest? Well she did that, but she didn’t get poison oak, she got poison penis....This is Herpes Simplex!” -Pummy
“Now she did not get that from a toilet seat....” -Pummy about HSV
“The people that are going to get this are the Ed Barnes of the world. They are people that have to shave often, so people in the military.” -Pummy on Pseudofolliculitis
“What is a carbuncle? Well its like a bunch of furuncle got together and said let’s have a kumbaya on the beach.” - Pummy
“Never let the sun go down on an abscess...” -Pummy
“What should you do with these patients? Tell them not to pick their nose!!!” - Pummy
“This is another big horse... this is a budweiser horse....” -Pummy on cellulitis
“If you remember nothing else from this school, if you see blue in cellulitis... it is necrotizing fascitis until proven otherwise.” -Pummy
“What is that picture on the Left... and DO NOT say that is a picture of me....” -Pummy in regards to an image of a butthole
“I am not a dermatologist... I am a nephrologist... but I have something to teach.” - Bahlodia
“Tinea versicolor, it doesn’t really do anything bad, it just makes you look ugly.” - Hoang
“You need to know this for your board exams... but clinically we don’t care what causes this because we treat both causes the same way.” Hoang
“When you do a skin scraping, and do a KOH prep what do you expect to see?” -Bahlodia
“Italian Food” -Student on the ‘spaghetti and meatballs’ pattern of m. furfur on KOH stain
“Erythema Nodosum is one of the pain in the neck things to treat clinically. You can do a 10K workup and still not be able to come up with an underlying cause.” - Hoang
“Pigmentation in a lesion worries clinicians a lot... they always think it is a melanoma. But pathologists... we come to the rescue!” -Parsa
“How do we know that this is a melanoma... its amelanotic... well to the rescue ::shows slides of staining techniques::” -Parsa
“You look at us, we are supposed to have two eyes and two ears... we are supposed to be symmetric. If you see asymmetry that is not normal.” -Hoang on ABCs of melanoma
“Remember we are DOs, we are damn good at touching people.” -Hoang on palpating melanoma
“Nobody likes to spend a $50 copay and an hour or thirty minutes of their time to hear the doctor say ‘oh its nothing’.” -Hoang
“I know it’s a pain in the neck to listen to a patient sometimes, but please do.” -Hoang
“If you don’t like to listen to patients, look for another job.”-Hoang
“A Cotton white T-shirt is only it’s only for modesty...it’s only SPF5” - Hoang
“People talk about SPF15... but they should be using SPF70... welcome to 2011..” - Hoang
“When you get to medical school you dump your hard drive and start putting all this stuff in... then you clean up your hard drive again in residency and dump everything you don’t need again... That’s life... just suck it up and memorize it and get your grade and then move on.” -Hoang
“This man is caucasian... if I sew it together I will make him slant eyed forever and he is not asian.... and I can’t move the ear forward because he does not want to be mr. spock...” - Hoang
“Well I really appreciated Dr. Hoang’s enthusiasm.... he gets me all excited when he talks.... and it’s not easy to get a pathologist excited.” - Parsa
“How you practice depends on how much you want to spend on your malpractice insurance... if you do it right... then it is lower, but if you do it wrong.... its a lot higher...” -Hoang
“Medications... and let’s face it... better living through chemistry, that is what life is all about.” - Hoang
“I am not a hair transplant dermatologist... so you don’t need to know the two different classification systems [for alopecia] - Hoang
Thanks Dr. Hoang.... you think next time you could leave the slide out of the ppt then if it isn’t relevant to the exam... I mean appreciate you being thorough and all with your 181 slide presentation...but really... its okay not to add more to it... k thanks!
This just in... you didn’t bother to submit questions for us anyway...so umm nvm?
“I tell the patients this is a sign of maturity... they don’t like to be called old. For the asian patients I tell them it is a sign of wisdom.” -Hoang on Seborrheic Keratosis
Sunday, April 3, 2011
Friday, April 1, 2011
How Inspiring...
“as a medical student your overload your harddrive with this stuff and you become a physician and you delete all the stuff you don’t need. its a pain in the neck to memorize this stuff..please understand the right of passage in medicine. Suck it up. Memorize this stuff. Get your grades. Clean up your hard drive and move on. I had to do it and you will do it and thats life. you guys are nothing special, we went through the same thing, we sucked it up just the same and we survived and you will to. thats life.”
Dr. H during a dermatology lecture
Dr. H during a dermatology lecture
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Monday, March 28, 2011
just had an amazing weekend with my classmates and had a good get-away from studying. i cant remember the last time i went more than 3 or 4 days without studying...obviously taking long breaks away from my computer is not very common in my life. so while on the plane coming back from a Georgian wedding i wanted to catch up on the last month of school. Lots of exciting ‘first times’ occurred and of course the most crazy of those events was doing my first Breast exam, female pelvic exam and male prostate exam [all in the span of 30mins]
i guess i can say i wasnt really nervous because it was in the middle of my Friday afternoon with my GI final coming up on that Monday and I was much more nervous about failing that exam then doing something wrong during the PBRs. thats probably because we had 6 large group sessions on that test making it one of the longest tests we have had and add on that i was barely studying GI during the weeks prior as I was focusing on my board exam studying...oh, and then add on that our professor gave a ‘pep talk’ on Friday morning telling us to not expect lots of As and Bs...that we should just be happy/satisfied with passing. yeah, all that kinda trumped the fact that i was about to stick my fingers into places that are not easily accessible... so that kinda shows ya how scared we all were for the GI final. Well, they must have scared the shit out of everyone because we all studied like soldiers preparing for battle and the class average ended up being around what it normally is and most of us did just fine. but really, did they need to add in that additional stress to the weekend? Another reason why i cannot wait to be done with lectures, classes and exams. Starting in June I will be working like a normal adult [though not getting paid...but im not gonna worry about that right now] and i wont have to stare at a computer screen for 12 hours a day and although i will be still taking plenty of tests to demonstrate my competence..it wont be nearly as frequent in the past 2 years.
but back to the PBR; the general class consensus was that they weren't too bad. We were scheduled for a certain time to show up to the standardized patient department [where we have our ‘learning to play doctor’ sessions] and we were escorted to a room. It was a total of 3 different rooms with 3 different people so i first did a breast exam on a lady then went to a different room and did a pelvic exam on another lady, and so on. Sure it was awkward not knowing what to do but there was an instructor right there next to us taking us through it and answering any questions that we had. After the procedure, the ‘patient’ gave us feedback to build our confidence by telling us ‘it didnt hurt’ [even though they might have been lying]. To note, these were people paid by the school to allow us to practice on them before we go out into hospitals and do it on innocent people who are paying us to do it...smart move to have us run through it once. I am sure you are curious as to the people that use this as income [as was i] but unfortunately no one knows for sure how much they get paid...i only heard a couple rumors but dont know if they were true. But, our instructor said that they will get about 10-12 students to practice on them in an afternoon...yes, 10-12 pelvic exams or fingers in the butt.... they better be paid well.
The next day i got to use my new skills by volunterring with 6 other students at a Womens health clinic. I ended up seeing 2 women--one was a 45 year old lady who was exctremely nervous and the other was a 60+ year old female who couldnt speak english so i needed a translator. For both patients I took their vitals then escorted them to their exam room where I did an initial history and short physical exam [listened to their heart, lungs, palpated their abdomen, etc] and then explained to them that i would leave the room and would come back with a doctor. Then after allowing them some time to change into a gown, i went in with a doctor and we did a pelvic exam. The doctor i was with did the first pelvic because the lady was a more complicated case and she was pretty nervous but then i did the exam on the second female. It is such an invasive and private exam and I was very honored that these women trusted me to be taking care of them. A little pick me up before a long couple days of studying for our GI final.
so anywho, those are the most notable things that happened recently. This Thursday will be my last shift at the Montclair clinic because the first year class will be taking it over so us second years can spend any and all time studying for boards. Sadly, the month of April is still jam packed with responsibilities, tests, mandatory lectures and attendance quizzes. Even though we have this HUGE exam looming in June our school doesnt really seem to care...so they went right ahead and decreased our life expectancy by adding massive amounts of cortisol [stress hormone] into our bloodstreams for a continuos 2.5 months. that sounds bad.. but i think it is probably true.
here’s to the end of spring break and the beginning of spring HELL
i guess i can say i wasnt really nervous because it was in the middle of my Friday afternoon with my GI final coming up on that Monday and I was much more nervous about failing that exam then doing something wrong during the PBRs. thats probably because we had 6 large group sessions on that test making it one of the longest tests we have had and add on that i was barely studying GI during the weeks prior as I was focusing on my board exam studying...oh, and then add on that our professor gave a ‘pep talk’ on Friday morning telling us to not expect lots of As and Bs...that we should just be happy/satisfied with passing. yeah, all that kinda trumped the fact that i was about to stick my fingers into places that are not easily accessible... so that kinda shows ya how scared we all were for the GI final. Well, they must have scared the shit out of everyone because we all studied like soldiers preparing for battle and the class average ended up being around what it normally is and most of us did just fine. but really, did they need to add in that additional stress to the weekend? Another reason why i cannot wait to be done with lectures, classes and exams. Starting in June I will be working like a normal adult [though not getting paid...but im not gonna worry about that right now] and i wont have to stare at a computer screen for 12 hours a day and although i will be still taking plenty of tests to demonstrate my competence..it wont be nearly as frequent in the past 2 years.
but back to the PBR; the general class consensus was that they weren't too bad. We were scheduled for a certain time to show up to the standardized patient department [where we have our ‘learning to play doctor’ sessions] and we were escorted to a room. It was a total of 3 different rooms with 3 different people so i first did a breast exam on a lady then went to a different room and did a pelvic exam on another lady, and so on. Sure it was awkward not knowing what to do but there was an instructor right there next to us taking us through it and answering any questions that we had. After the procedure, the ‘patient’ gave us feedback to build our confidence by telling us ‘it didnt hurt’ [even though they might have been lying]. To note, these were people paid by the school to allow us to practice on them before we go out into hospitals and do it on innocent people who are paying us to do it...smart move to have us run through it once. I am sure you are curious as to the people that use this as income [as was i] but unfortunately no one knows for sure how much they get paid...i only heard a couple rumors but dont know if they were true. But, our instructor said that they will get about 10-12 students to practice on them in an afternoon...yes, 10-12 pelvic exams or fingers in the butt.... they better be paid well.
The next day i got to use my new skills by volunterring with 6 other students at a Womens health clinic. I ended up seeing 2 women--one was a 45 year old lady who was exctremely nervous and the other was a 60+ year old female who couldnt speak english so i needed a translator. For both patients I took their vitals then escorted them to their exam room where I did an initial history and short physical exam [listened to their heart, lungs, palpated their abdomen, etc] and then explained to them that i would leave the room and would come back with a doctor. Then after allowing them some time to change into a gown, i went in with a doctor and we did a pelvic exam. The doctor i was with did the first pelvic because the lady was a more complicated case and she was pretty nervous but then i did the exam on the second female. It is such an invasive and private exam and I was very honored that these women trusted me to be taking care of them. A little pick me up before a long couple days of studying for our GI final.
so anywho, those are the most notable things that happened recently. This Thursday will be my last shift at the Montclair clinic because the first year class will be taking it over so us second years can spend any and all time studying for boards. Sadly, the month of April is still jam packed with responsibilities, tests, mandatory lectures and attendance quizzes. Even though we have this HUGE exam looming in June our school doesnt really seem to care...so they went right ahead and decreased our life expectancy by adding massive amounts of cortisol [stress hormone] into our bloodstreams for a continuos 2.5 months. that sounds bad.. but i think it is probably true.
here’s to the end of spring break and the beginning of spring HELL
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